Scenes from the Wilds of Suburbia

My very first attempt at a nature sketch.

This is the plant I was attempting to sketch. Not bad, right?? Anybody know what it is?

Logan took this one. All of these were taken on the trail that runs alongside our neighborhood.

Watch out for thorns!

How cool is this?? It's very viny and thorny back there.

Gypsy moth nest. I think. There were caterpillars in there.

Logan was enamored of the y-shaped stick.

Critter hole. We watched it for a while, but alas, nothing came out.

Towering pines.

The artiste at work.

Logan in a tree that I'm trying to identify. I know NOTHING about trees.

These are the leaves. Red maple, right? Or is it sycamore? According to my field guide the leaves are very similar.

And what's this tree, with the long pod-looking things?

As you can tell, I'm about as amateur a naturalist as you can get. But I'm enthusiastic and determined to learn! At the ripe age of 47, I am suddenly passionate about the ecosystem of the great state of New Jersey, where I've lived my entire life, completely oblivious to the local flora and fauna. Just goes to show, you never know when a new passion will strike, and it's never too late to learn. If anybody can help with identifying those trees, so I can properly fill out my nature journal, I'd appreciate it!

.....Aaaaand We're Back

Hello, my lovely fellow homeschoolers! Did you miss me while I was gone, launching my new blog?


I had toyed with the idea of deleting this one permanently, but now that I've found my groove over at THL, I think I can handle both. Plus, this blog is an important record of the things we do as homeschoolers. I found myself wanting to write about our adventures today, on this, our official Not Back-to-School Day.


When September rolls around, I realize that I'm not completely deschooled, and may never be. I'm not even sure I want to be. I loved school when I was a kid, and especially loved all the preparations leading up to the first day. I was excited to buy all my supplies--the new Trapper Keeper, folders, crisp white paper and pens, and of course new clothes, too. But more than anything, I loved the feeling of a fresh start, a feeling that still comes over me like clockwork every September.


Just like last September, I'm starting this new school year (see? I'm still thinking in terms like "school year") feeling like we need more structure in our days. I'm also having math panic. Last year, I bought Logan a 2nd grade math curriculum that came highly recommended called Math Mammoth. I was thrilled when, in the beginning of the year, I didn't even have to ask him to work in it. He had always loved math, and was enthusiastic about his new workbooks. See? I said to my skeptical husband. Unschooling works. I just leave it out and he does it. (To my hardcore unschooling compatriots: yes, I'm aware that leaving out a workbook in the fervent hope that your kid will just spontaneously decide to do it is not unschooling. And, as it turns out, not realistic.)


Of course, just a few weeks in, he tired of them, and like the good unschooler I was trying to be, I put them away and never mentioned them again. Now, as any homeschooling parent knows, math and numbers are a part of everyday life. A kid doesn't need workbooks to pick up a basic understanding of math, and Logan knows how to add and subtract, keep track of his scores on video games, and do simple money transactions (thanks to Monopoly). He does not, however, know how to carry or borrow, he doesn't know his multiplication tables, and he doesn't know how to read an analog clock--all things he would have learned last year, in second grade.


So, it seems that I have now joined the camp of people who unschool everything but math. My older kids asked to go back to public school after several years of homeschooling, and because I had insisted they keep up with grade-level math, they were actually ahead of their peers when they returned to school. I really believe I'll be doing Logan a disservice if I don't ensure that he has the same option. Life learning should be about expanding choices, not limiting them. If that makes me more of an eclectic homeschooler than an unschooler, then so be it. As I began to realize last year, we're kind of a hybrid. More relaxed and radical than the other families in our local homeschooling group, but more structured and conservative than some of the families we've met at unschooling conferences. This year, I'm going to embrace our unique brand of homeschooling and let my intuition guide me to do what's best for our family.


I've also added a little focus to our days by highlighting whatever wacky (or sometimes serious) National Day it is, and using that as a jumping off point. I bought a whiteboard for the kitchen, and each day I'll write "Today is National Whatever Day". I also plan to write a quote-of-the-day. So, without further ado, here's what we did today: 

Yep, we did a page of math. After I dug out last year's workbook and had a talk with him about why I was suddenly insisting that he do at least a page of math a day, we sat down together and I showed him how to tell time. On an actual non-digital clock.

We went for a morning walk around our neighborhood. Well, technically, I walked, and Logan rode his bike. We plan to make the morning walk a daily event.


We celebrated National Grandma Moses Day! I found a website with a short kid-friendly bio, which I read aloud to Logan, and then we looked at some of her paintings together online. We talked about how maybe having discovered a new passion so late in life helped her live to be 101.

We played Oceanolopy. It's Monopoly with sea life. We played it for a really, really long time. :) As I mentioned earlier, Monopoly is great for learning about money management.


We went to the BMX track. Logan is new to BMX racing, and wanted to go to the track to practice. He rode his bike, and I sat in the shade and read.


We went to the library. We saw not one, but two, monarch butterflies today, and so we stopped at the library to find some books about monarchs and learn about their migration route. We walked out with a huge pile of books!

We baked cookies. When we came home we made really easy gluten-free almond butter chocolate chunk cookies  (from Clean Eating magazine). I burnt them a little, but they were still yummy.


Interspersed throughout all this activity was some MarioKart with friends, and a visit from the birthday boy, my oldest son Zachary. A very busy Not Back-to-School Day indeed!

Sorting and Counting Hot Wheels

Earlier today, I noticed Logan was being awfully quiet in his room, and when I went to investigate here's what I found:


He had sorted all of his Hot Wheels and Matchboxes by color! Right after I took this pic, he asked for help counting them, and here's the final tally.

Silver--37
Gold--12
Pink--5
White--45
Green--42
Black--42
Brown--12
Yellow--40
Red--96
Blue--96
"Special" cars in a display of favorites that didn't get sorted--59

Grand total--485!! Wow! We knew he had a lot of cars (he gets a new one every time we go to the grocery store, plus multi-packs for all birthdays and holidays) but had no idea there were so many. I told him there are probably more around here that didn't get counted, in the couch, under furniture, outside, in my car. If we find anymore, we'll update the tally. I'm thrilled to be able to share his passion with him!

Best. Comic. EVER.

Logan and I just read all six episodes of this awesome comic, written by a 5-year-old, and illustrated by his 29-year-old brother. Episode 7 comes out later today!

Later on, we'll be packing for our long snowy drive to the Unschool Winter Waterpark Gathering in Ohio. It'll be our second conference, and we're so excited! I'm especially looking forward to the keynote speaker, John Taylor Gatto, who wrote Dumbing Us Down (and whose title was the inspiration for the title of this blog!)

Back in Action!

Took some time off while I thought about what I wanted this blog to be. I had been focusing only on our homeschooling, while leaving out all the messy, juicy LIFE stuff and so of course the result was...well, a little dry.

Plus, what I'm finally, finally starting to really GET, deep down in my bones, is that because we are unschoolers, all that messy, juicy life stuff IS learning. Once you've been living this way for a while (and we're coming up on a year now), you realize that you can't separate out the "unschooling" from everything else. It's ALL learning, ALL the time. It seems silly to me now that we ever thought about it any other way.

Our unschooling encompasses everything we're into at the moment. For Logan, that means learning how to find shortcuts on MarioKart, making videos on his new camera, reading his Hot Wheels magazine, practicing breakdancing. For me, it means learning how to build my own website and start a business, deepening my Tarot study, honoring The Compact, and editing my novel. Even Ely, who doesn't have as much free time as Logan and I do, has been reading one of my Tarot books.

Unschooling--life-learning--is all about following our passions, so it's impossible to blog about it without blogging about all of life. I'm making a personal commitment to write here at least three times a week, and document our family's journey in all its juicy, messy, wonderful glory.

By the way, like the new look? This template was free at yummy lolly

Elevator Speech

After two recent homeschool gatherings, where I somehow couldn't manage to explain unschooling coherently, I realized I need an "elevator speech". This is a concept I first heard about in our former UU church (UUism is another thing that's hard to explain!). If I was riding in an elevator with someone, and they asked me what unschooling was, would I be able to describe it clearly and positively in 50 words or less, before the elevator doors open?

At our last park day, there were two moms brand new to homeschooling. As one of the only unschoolers there, I felt like it was my job to advocate for unschooling, and I failed miserably. I saw the look of confusion on one mom's face as I tried to explain it, and then came the question: "Wait a minute--so you don't make him do anything?? At all? What do you DO all day?" The other mom seemed to be listening intently, and nodding, and then said, "I've heard Calvert is really good." Aaarrgh!

To further muddy the waters, I've come to realize that there's a big difference between people who are just unschooling academics (an oxymoron if ever there was one), and whole-life unschoolers like us. I've been so steeped in the RU (Radical Unschooling, another term for whole-life unschooling) lifestyle the last few months, that I forget that most of the moms I'm talking with in real life have never even heard the term. They're just trying to wrap their minds around not using a curriculum, and here I am babbling on about unconditional parenting and no bedtimes, and god knows what else. Let's edge away slowly from the crazy lady, dear.....

So. My mission for today is to create my "elevator speech" so that when unsuspecting newbies ask me about unschooling, I don't scare them away. Does anybody have a good one I can use?

Our First Conference!

Ely told the kids to "strike a pose."

Kandee Wright and Dayna Martin, and their very comfy babies

Keith Wright, Eli Gerzon, Ely, and Joe Martin

Last weekend, Ely, Logan and I went to Wakefield, Mass. for our very first unschooling conference. It was so empowering to finally meet other families actually living this way. To be honest, I already knew most of the nuts-and-bolts, how-to-unschool stuff from all the reading I've done. I get it. This conference, for me, was all about forging a real connection to the unschooling community in a way that the internet just cannot do. We met so many amazing people. I came away energized and galvanized, more sure than ever that unschooling is the way to go for our family. Plus, it was just so much fun!

Some random impressions and memories:

--an adorable little girl strumming her plastic guitar at the talent show

--all the confident, outgoing, interesting teens and young adults

--Logan joyfully being chased down the hall by his new friends, all chanting his name

--Ely bonding with other unschooling dads, and realizing that maybe I'm not so crazy with this unschooling thing, after all

--enjoying the very talented unschooled singer songwriter Julian Baptista, and the unschooled Ryan siblings' Irish folk band, Fishing with Finnegan

--listening to Dayna Martin's talk on Sunday morning with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes because her words hit so close to home

--sitting on the floor late into the night, drinking, laughing, and talking with other unschooling moms

--actually winning some cool stuff at the auction!

--not wanting it to end

Swarms of Books and Flying Ants

I see that somehow almost three weeks have gone by since my last post! When I disappear from my blog for weeks at a time, you can safely assume I've been on a book jag. Let's see....what have I read in the last few weeks? Radical Unschooling by Dayna Martin (AMAZING, and I will write a review here and on Amazon when I have more time), The Strain by Guillermo Del Toro and Chuck Hogan (devoured it in two days), Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn (I need to get the DVD and make my husband watch because he's not really getting what I'm doing), Amazing Grays by Maggie Rose Crane (about embracing aging), and now I'm halfway through Julie and Julia by Julie Powell (I'm on a major foodie kick). Still on my to-be-read stack are three new Tarot books, two Wicca books, Queen of Broken Hearts by Cassandra King, two books by Byron Katie (I want to see what all the fuss is about "the Work"), and Heat by Bill Buford (another foodie memoir). And that's not even counting the paperback I started to read in Borders the other day called This Little Mommy Stayed Home by Samantha Wilde (daughter of one of my favorite writers Nancy Thayer) which had me drawing stares from strangers because I was laughing so hard. I put it back on the shelf because it wasn't in the budget that day, but I keep thinking about it. Hilarious!

So, what with my heavy reading schedule and all, you can see why it's difficult to find time to post here. Also, every computer in the house is not working at the moment, except the one I'm currently writing this post on, Chelsea's itty bitty laptop. Four people sharing one computer is not pretty.

In other news, we've been invaded by swarms of flying ants. We've lived in this house for 18 years, and have had our share of critter problems (on my old blog, I wrote about The Great Squirrel Infestation of 2004), but flying ants are a first. Yesterday Logan and I went online to determine that they were, in fact, flying ants and not termites. They're definitely ants, which I suppose is slightly better than termites, but still not great. They could be carpenter ants, and they're definitely coming from under the house. We learned that this swarming behavior will only last a few days--they're basically emerging to mate and then die--but that doesn't change the fact that we have a colony of ants living in our crawlspace that is eventually going to have to be exterminated.

I guess we'll add "exterminator" to the list of stuff we need to save for, after computer repairs, a new central air system (or at least some freon before it gets really hot), and spending money for our trip to the NE Unschooling Conference next month. Actually, I have our money situation well in hand these days, but it would be nice to have a month or two go by without some kind of unexpected expense. You would think that after 18 years as a homeowner I would learn to expect the unexpected!

7 Blocks

This morning, I wanted a newspaper. Normally I just hop in the van and drive the 7 blocks to Wawa (a ubiquitous South Jersey convenience store, for those not from around here), but today finally the sun was out and the day was scrubbed clean and gorgeous. "Hey, why don't we walk?" I said to Logan.

The first interesting thing we came upon was a squashed frog in the road. Of course Logan wanted to take an up-close and personal look so we did. Then we noticed we were walking through a drift of pink flower petals and I pointed out to Logan that the tree above us was losing its flowers and growing new spring leaves. We took a good look at the nearest branch and then I caught the unmistakeable aroma of lilac. Sure enough, behind the tree was a flowering lilac bush. We both buried our faces in the blooms and inhaled deeply. "It smells kind of like vanilla," Logan said.

We went to take our usual detour down a dirt road that leads to a lake, but saw that there was a newly strung chain across the way, and a very definitive sign warning us to Keep Out! All righty then. So we kept going down the street and--omigod--I almost stepped on a snake! It was right at the edge of somebody's lawn, about a foot into the road. I recognized it as a cousin of the garter snake that almost gave me a heart attack in my backyard last year. It was perfectly still, except for its little tongue darting in and out. We squatted down to take a closer look (Logan closer than I). We noticed that the lawn's owners had just mowed, and surmised that the snake was probably trying to escape the mower. "Yeah, but what if it gets hit by a car?" Logan asked. I wished that I was brave enough to pick it up and throw it back into the grass, but alas, I was not. I asked Logan if he wanted to pick it up and throw it back, and he also declined. So we kept going, crossing our fingers that the snake would make it to safety.

Less than a block away, what should we find in the road, but damn! A smushed snake! We gave this one a wide berth since it had flies all over it, and then suddenly noticed that we were walking through a swirling storm of floating white fuzzies. "What the heck...?" There were hundreds of them! They looked like dandelion fluff, but they seemed to be coming from way high up in the trees. We shielded our eyes and peered into the sky but we couldn't figure out where they were coming from. Laughing, we snatched at the air, trying to catch some, but they were elusive little buggers. As we walked, the cloud thinned out and disappeared and then reappeared about a block later. This time, it was obvious where they were coming from--the ground. Logan said, "It was dandelion fluff."

"Mystery solved," I said. "The wind must have carried it up above the trees, and then they floated back down. Now you know why there are dandelions all over the place."

"Why?"

"Those are seeds. The wind carries them away and wherever they land--presto! More dandelions."

"I didn't see any seeds," said Logan. So we picked a dandelion puffball, and pulled out a few fuzzies so he could see the seeds attached to the ends.

By now we had almost gotten to Wawa, and Logan noticed muddy tire tracks on the newly paved road. He spent a few minutes speculating as to what type of vehicle might have made the tracks, and decided that that it must have been some kind of truck. We spent our last few minutes before going into the store reading the names some kids had written in the concrete. We bought our newspapers and some munchies and headed back home.

As we passed the spot where our friendly neighborhood garter snake had been, we were very relieved to see he was nowhere in sight, and so had clearly made it across the street unscathed. We resolved to be braver in the future and pick up and move any imperiled snakes to safety.

As we turned back onto our street, I said, "I'm sure glad we didn't take the van."

Logan smiled up at me, clutching his dandelions. "Me too."

Homeschool Heaven

What better way to commemorate my inaugural post than by showing off the bonanza of goodies that arrived from Barnes and Noble the other day? (Yes, there's a Tarot book in there for me, too.) We've been having a blast with the games--Logan loves Mille Bornes as I knew he would--but the big surprise was the Barenaked Ladies' Snacktime! cd of songs for children. I would totally listen to it even if I didn't have a kid in the car.

I devoured The Unschooling Unmanual in less than a day. For those who may wander in here and not know (hi Mom!), unschooling is much more than just a homeschooling method. It's a whole lifestyle, a way of living, parenting, and learning together as a family. It requires unlearning everything we ever thought we knew about getting a "proper education". That process of unlearning is called "deschooling", and that's where we're at now. If it looks like every day around here is Saturday, that's because we're living as though it is. No need for schedules, curriculum, textbooks, or tests. As these photos from our first few weeks attest, living IS learning!